What should every American know before traveling to the UK?
07.06.2025 03:08
Nevertheless, since some of our lovely British friends on Quora wanted to throw in their jabs, here’s what I find funny when they make certain points and think they’re being astute and witty.
7. “We aint fat like youse all is, our foods be well healthy and normal likes!” - Talk about throwing stones in a glass house - have these people seen their countrymen of late or maybe taken a look in the mirror or at their missus?
3. “Youse be amazed but we uses contactless cards! It be amazing technologies you ain’t got”… whoa what the fuck are those? Paying in card anyway is soo alien to us! I thought we could write cheques for everything like you think we do at home from toiletries to a pack of beer. Gee whiz. You guys are soo futuristic!
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It’s not so much different from home, really, but different enough that you will like it. In terms of traveling if one is a very green American who hasn’t been overseas, it’s the most novice level. Don’t judge by the cretins of Quora, most of them are pretty cool.
10. “We walks places. It ain’t be a crime like in the US!” - You got me there. My neighbors don’t jog or walk in the morning around our block for exercise, we can’t take our dogs out for walks, the public parks are just there for show, with summer vacation we don’t see groups of kids just hanging around and walking about. My poor uncle - guy has never owned a car a day in his life and he walks everywhere. I keep warning him it’s only a matter of time before the cops decide to stop him and use him for target practice.
6. “Don’t talks about our NHS in a pub!” - good to know because Americans use their scant couple weeks’ vacation and spend thousand of dollars just to discuss the merits of healthcare systems in European countries when they go abroad for fun, especially when we want to go out for drinks. Do we know how to party or what?
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“You septics needs a passports. You cant just come in ’ere likes and you’ll find that well hard way when you gets to ‘eafrow!” - yeaaa except we need to have already provided our passport number and the name must match when we booked our airline ticket and/or a tour. You also need to have it again to get your boarding pass at the airport and then again to get through security check and then again before you are allowed to board the flight to the destination. So, there wouldn’t be a scenario where some Yank found themselves at Gatwick or Heathrow or wherever befuddled they can’t proceed further because they wouldn’t have been able to leave the US in the first place without the passport…
5. “We waits in queues here” - waiting in line? What a novel idea! Why, here in the US, you never see people form lines. And if they do, that’s pussy shit! If you’re bigger than someone, shove past ‘em! Step aside, grandma, I’m bigger and stronger than you. We have no conception of waiting our turn. It’s the law of the jungle here at the supermarket or theme park. Might makes right!
8. “You won’t get over how smarter we is!” - Yeah, no.
9. “We respects peoples from other cultures!” - because diversity is so foreign to people from a country where 99% of the population is descended from immigrants from all over the world. I will be shocked being from a major metro area in the US at how multicultural Edinburgh is. And nothing says tolerance for one another like mobs of British freaking out about migrants, radicalized mosques, the sectarian conflict in Northern Ireland. You are so far ahead of us..
2. “Hahaha you cants brings your guns!”… thanks, chief. We get that. Most of us don’t own one anyway and most that do are OK with not taking them to places. You also can’t bring a gun with you to the airport for checked, stowaway luggage for domestic flights without prior clearance made and approved in advance. You could try it, of course, but you won’t be worried about the customs at Heathrow, you’ll be dragged into a room and interrogated and facing serious federal felonies before you ever board.